#72 – Dan Harris: 10% happier – meditation, kindness, and compassion

In this episode, Dan Harris, correspondent for ABC News and co-founder of the Ten Percent Happier meditation app, speaks openly about his struggles with self-centeredness, addiction, depression, emotional volatility, and the deep-rooted insecurities that drove him to career success. He tells the story of how a panic attack on live TV lead him down a path of self-discovery culminating in a meditation practice which has since transformed his life—in terms of his own personal suffering, his relationships with those closest to him, and his ability to be kind and compassionate (which has its own selfish advantages). Dan also shares some very practical advice and tips for new meditators, dispels some of the myths around meditation, and gives people some things to look forward to as they progress with their practice. Last but not least, we talk about the importance of not passing shame and trauma to our kids and the role that mindfulness and meditation plays in that. 

Want more content like this? Check out our interviews with Kristin Neff on the power of self-compassion and Esther Perel on the effects of trauma.

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We discuss:

• Dan’s meditation book, and the panic attack on live TV that started it all [8:00];
• Addiction: the spectrum of addiction, the socially acceptable forms, and Dan’s own battle with addiction and depression [13:30];
• Dan’s drive for self-protection, a defining moment of childhood, and how his upbringing shaped him [20:30];
• A selfish reason to be kind and compassionate [28:30];
• Using mindfulness to avoid being controlled by your emotions such as anger and grandiosity [36:15];
• How Dan found meditation, and how he went from skeptic to someone willing to try it [40:45];
• Advice for new meditators, misconceptions about meditation, and the difference between changes in state vs. changes in trait [48:00];
• Difference between being “mindful” versus being “present” [55:00];
• The overlap between psychology and Buddhism, who is the real Buddha, and a Buddhism 101 lesson [57:45];
• What convinced Dan to finally try meditation, and how did his first session go? [1:05:30];
• Lessons from Dan’s 10-day silent retreat: “You’re trying too hard” [1:12:30];
• How Dan’s meditation has evolved over 10 years of practice [1:27:30];
• Dan’s 360 Review: A painful process illuminating his selfishness, and putting him on a path to more kindness and compassion [1:30:45];
• How to quiet mental suffering in tough times, and how meditation has helped (and not helped) Dan get through some of the hardest moments of his life [1:41:30];
• How Dan’s practice has made him a better husband [1:47:45];
• How to prevent the transference of trauma and shame to your kids [1:50:45];
• Does past trauma drive successful people? Can a person be successful professionally if they give up that negative insecurity that is driving them? [1:56:00];
• The pillars of emotional health, and how to help yourself when you feel insecure [2:08:30];
• Why it’s important to let your kids see that you are a flawed human [2:11:30];
• Learning from the incredible (but flawed) Peter Jennings [2:15:15];
• When is Dan’s next book coming out? [2:21:15]; and
• More.

Dan’s meditation book, and the panic attack on live TV that started it all [8:00]

Dan’s book

• Peter says Dan’s book, 10% Happier, has “almost single-handedly been responsible for my interest in meditation”
• Peter comments on how he likes the title because it doesn’t “overpromise”

The embarrassing event that started Dan’s journey towards mental health

“A few seconds in I just lost the ability to breathe. My palms were sweaty, my heart was racing, my lungs seized up, I just couldn’t talk.”

• While filling in as the “newsreader” on Good Morning America, Dan had a panic attack on live television
• The audience was 5 million people
• This incident led Dan down a path of trying to figure out WHY this happened

Addiction: the spectrum of addiction, the socially acceptable forms, and Dan’s own battle with addiction and depression [13:30]

Dan’s time as a reporter in war zones

• After 9/11, Dan spent a lot of time in war zones 
• Afghanistan, Pakistan, Israel, Gaza, and Iraq
• When he returned home, he got depressed
• Having trouble getting out of bed and felt sick a lot
• At this point, he didn’t really know WHY he felt depressed

Cocaine use

• One night out, someone offered Dan some cocaine …

{end of show notes preview}

Dan Harris

Dan Harris is a correspondent for ABC News, co-anchor for the weekend edition of Good Morning America, and formerly the co-anchor of Nightline. He has reported from all over the world, covering wars in Afghanistan, Israel/Palestine, and Iraq, and producing investigative reports in Haiti, Cambodia, and the Congo. He has also spent many years covering religion in America, despite the fact that he is agnostic.

He wrote the book 10% Happier, a #1 New York Times bestseller, then launched the Ten Percent Happier podcast and co-founded the Ten Percent Happier meditation app. He is currently working on a new book about kindness and compassion with an estimated release date of 2021.